Gravitational Regret
by Wario the TableMan
Summary: Cole and Jay have trouble seeing eye-to-eye yet again


As brothers of a spiritual sense, Jay cared immensely for the downtrodden Cole. The mighty ninja of earth wept into his sleeve, unable to contain the emotions that threatened to tear him in half.

Jay could do nothing other than rest a loving hand upon his friend's shoulder. He did not know what to say, knowing all too well that there was probably nothing that he could do otherwise.

"Why?" Cole exhaled after several moments free of uncontrolled sobs. "Why did he have to go?"

Jay looked down at the gravestone. He wished he could take on Cole's pain as his own, alleviate at least some of the stress.

"We all have our time, Cole," said Jay. He was not sure what else to say.

Cole glared at Jay. "That's easy for you to say… You've never loved someone who was taken away from you just like that!" He snapped his fingers in accordance to his pained words.

Jay looked down again and saw the precious peony fluttering in the wind upon the disturbed dirt. He took a deep breath and reached out a hand, delving it underneath the peony.

"What are you doing!?" cried Cole, in a spell of confusion slowly mounting into boiling rage.

"Behold, my brotherly kin!" said Jay.

YOINK!

And out from the grime, Jay had extracted the wholesome good, the Earth Taco.

"No, you monster!" seethed Cole.

"It is at last my calling!" said Jay.

"Don't!" screamed Cole as he unlocked the final evolution of all Spinjitsu: Cowjitsu.

Jay eyed Cole's determination, took the Earth Taco, and placed it into the secret compartment.

"No more secrets, Jay!" roared Cole as he thought about purity. He charged forward and dropkicked Jay into oblivion (not the game, the noun).

Jay arose from the oblivion. He took out his Electric Salsa Jar given to him by the one and only Mark Hamill.

"But what about Ben?" asked Mark from the Flying Nimbus.

"What about Karen?" grunted Jay and he unlocked the lid with a godly flex of his totally rad biceps. He enhanced the Earth Taco with the glory of the jarred innards.

"This is not a good sign, brohan…" said Cole with the eyes of eye-having.

"Knuckle down, Dinosaur-Face!" said Jay with rude name-calling. Cole had never been more offended in his whole entire ninja life, even when he was a Danny Phantom boyo.

"Plant Gang forever, homedawg…" whispered Jay saucily into Cole's nonexistent ear (left, not right).

"OW! MY LEFT EAR!" cried Cole. He cried like a manufactured pony. He took said pony and placed the E he had received from Lord Farquaad himself. So much love and goodness later, plus cabbage…

The pony had become a peony…

"Dart…" said Jay with an inhale. "Mouth…" with the immediate exhale. He took to his fingers, all four of them. He was all thumbs.

"Clumsy oaf!" screamed Cole with his wit and vigor. He took two spoonsful of vinegar and reached it into the universal system centered around Jay himself. Jay got the vinegar into his own shoe.

"I see," said Zane, seeking the events transpiring through the spyglass he had received from the Falcon.

"Hey," said Kai as he looked with Zane, spaghetti into the journey, most Clydesdales into the bucket, all mermaids and merman about Lethal Lava Land.

"What a stinkin' Mipsclip…" growled the angry throat of Zane. He saw and said.

"See?" said Kai.

"Yes," said Zane.

"Bark!" said the Falcon.

"What is that, brother?" asked Zane as he looked deeply into the ocular avian organs. He did a flip like somebody once told me.

"Nice flip, my friend," said the Kai.

That's when it occurred. It occurred like the revolution. 120 revolutions per speedrun. I'm sure of it, Smith. This is a heart, of course…

Ned, no…

When Ned got his hands on Kai's glasses, he wore them with the utmost pride. He lurched over to Sensei Wu and got his toast. He handed it to Winston.

"Winston?" said Kai as he unloaded his shovel. The fire on it made sense.

"Stop making cents," said Zane, with money hatred.

"Okey-doke," said Kai and he ceased all effort for cash.

"Checking," said Zane's survey eyeballs. He had the Nindroid powers of all serpents of the east.

"What about the west and the north and, verily, the south?" asked Kai.

Zane spat out his yogurt upon Kai's single life. All people knew then the truth.

Once it was over, Cole and Jay looked at one another, still angered by accomplishments and prior misconceptions.

"Tough, isn't it," revealed Jay.

"Shut up, Jason Walker," said Cole and then he eliminated tush.

"MAN! It hurts to be this hip," said Jay. He took twice as much meatloaf and packed it into the ice cube tray.

"I suppose it is indeed rap battle time…" murmured Cole. He took out his electric banjo and played a little ditty. This was in honour of his daddy.

But he was sure Jay had no earthly clue about the truth.

"Yup," agreed Jay, but he hated Cole's guts, especially today, on this day, many moons ago.

"I'mma name my son, Moon," said Cole. He took of a scribbling pen and signed the name of his firstborn in the dust of the earth. As the ninja of earth itself, Cole had the authority to claim authorship. "How do you like my authorship, Jay?"

"Yes, person object!" said Jay as he took a big slimy residue from the microwave. He cleaned the microwave. All was well and good. But Superman does well good when he saved Little Timmy.

**FIN**


End file.
